Watch Your Mouth

** Please Note: the below blog contains offensive language. 

Please read with caution. Apologies to the readers who may be offended**

Jerk, dickhead, dumbass…. These words flow freely off the tongue in today’s society like water from a waterfall. We can tell ourselves it means nothing, they have just become a figure of speech, but have they? Each time a person is labelled with one of these terms are they affected or hurt? Think about the last time you were called something, you probably blew it off, but I can bet some of you reading this would have felt slightly offended. You would have laughed it off, or had an epic comeback, but without you realising it, it chipped away at part of you. I can hear some of you guys out there saying: this is just a “girl” thing, boys don’t get affected by that sort of language, it’s just how they talk to each other, it is “normal”. They are the people that would say that those boys who do take it personally are not “real” boys, they are soft cocks, wimps, mummy’s boys, but how is this not the same? – I am sorry for causing any offense by this, but I am simply trying to prove a point. Those people that say these sort of things, are you not injuring some other person’s self-esteem? Why are they not as good as you? Why do you have to degrade them so they feel rejected and worthless?

Now think about the last time one of these words rolled off your tongue. Was it directed at someone? How did it make you feel? Tough? Or a coward? How do you think it made them feel? Worthless? Inadequate? We need to remember not everyone is built the same, not everyone has the same resilience to this language. I am not saying that these words are the explicit cause of men’s mental instability, I am simply saying that they can affect a person and contribute to their mental health, and we need to be more aware of how we speak to males because they are vulnerable too. The ability to think before you act or speak is a powerful skill. I challenge all of you reading this to try and think before you speak today and take note of how many times these words slip from your mouth without you realising. How many people do you chip away at?

Don’t believe me, then maybe Gadit¹ can convince you. The article discusses several trials which relates verbal abuse to mental disorders and brain damage. Studies have shown an increase in psychiatric disorders, and a 10% reduction in grey matter of the brain, in adults who were verbally abused as children compared to adults who were not. It also commented on males being less tolerable to verbal abuse than females. Another source also notes bullying as a possible predisposing cause for personality disorders, and it encourages doctors to consider this aspect of a patient’s history in diagnosis.² 

So now tell me, will you still use this language as freely?

References:

1.  Gadit AAM. Verbal Abuse: Does it lead to Mental Disorder? Journal of Pakistan Medical Association. 2011 April 2011;61(4):404-405.

2.  Jackie Craissati, Minoudis P, Shaw J, Chuan SJ, Simons S, Joseph N.  In: Working with personality disordered offenders: A practitioners guide. 2011